Does what you expect affect what you get?

I want to celebrate my son. 

He got his A level results in the summer and decided to defer the university place he earned to take a year off to work and travel.

But it’s how he put his plan into action that really impressed me.

He knew a couple of people from older years that had jobs in construction and leant on their experience for advice. He reworked his CV. He did a couple of online courses. Then lobbied recruiters and further adapted his CV until he got a job that pays him more than he's had in his young life.

What struck me wasn't just how quickly he achieved the result. It was his undiluted confidence that a job was waiting for him. He fixed his sights on an outcome and drew it towards him.

It would be easy to say that it was youthful presumption, but there was more to it than that. His mental picture was of a person more than capable of doing a construction job. He had a clarity of belief that opportunities were out there. And when one recruiter said no, he wasn't deterred. He just moved on to the next.

No catastrophising. No spiral of self-doubt. Just: "That one didn't work out. Next."

I talk about this with clients. Your mental blueprint—the story you tell yourself about who you are, what you're capable of and what you can expect for yourself—shapes so much of what follows.

If your blueprint says "I'm not ready" or "opportunities like that don't come to people like me," you'll filter out evidence to the contrary. You'll stop before you start.

But if your blueprint says "I'm capable, and the right opportunity is out there," you keep going. Setbacks become information, not verdicts.

My son didn't need confidence-building or help reframing rejection. He already had a helpful blueprint in place. And that made all the difference.

When you genuinely believe you're capable—not in a fake-it-till-you-make-it way, but in a grounded, matter-of-fact way—you approach challenges differently. You don't take rejection personally. You don't assume one closed door means all doors are closed.

You just move on to the next one.

I'm proud of him. Not just because he landed the job, but because he backed himself, stayed clear on what he wanted, and kept going when things didn't go to plan.

So if you're waiting for the right opportunity, or telling yourself you're not ready, ask yourself: what's my mental blueprint?

Because it's not the world that determines what's possible. It's the story you're telling yourself about what you're capable of. 

And if you want to rewrite your story, let’s start a conversation.

Does what you expect affect what you get?